You better not pout, you better not deny...

...you better not advertise for a normal Santa Claus, at least if you work for mall operator Hull Storey Retail Group.

The Orangeburg, SC mall manager sent out a flier looking for a jolly ole stand-in for St. Nick:

It identified the basic qualifications as “hygienically clean; preferably Caucasian; jolly — enjoys being with children; natural beard a plus, but not necessary; okay to carry a few extra pounds! We’ll even provide extra milk and cookies as a bonus!”The flier raised the immediate ire of some mall tenants.

Travis Griffin, who has leased a cell phone kiosk at the mall for about a year, said the flier is a “slap in the face” for all African-Americans who both work and shop at the mall. “This has drawn the line,” he said.

The Augusta, Ga.-based mall owner Hull Storey Retail Group received the flier via fax Thursday evening and upon receipt terminated the manager immediately, said John Gibson, Hull Storey president and chief executive officer.

“We called the mall manager and she confirmed to us at that time that she in fact had written this,” Gibson said. “This is completely contrary to our policies, to my personal beliefs and, I would hope, the values of the people in our company.”

It is not exactly clear from the article what the African American kiosk operator was objecting to. "Hygienically clean" certainly smacks of white, Western bias. Preference for someone "jolly" would seem to rub him the wrong way as well, judging from his apparently curmudgeonly disposition. Blacks tend to have skin problems making shaving difficult, and allegedly love women "with big back," so we can rule out the beard and cookies as issues. Unless, of course, there was no consideration given to minority contractor set-asides for the cookie vending.

Judging by the immediate belly crawl of the CEO, he has to be a white man, so we must dig deeper for an explanation. You have to hand it to the company though. How many companies are thorough enough to outline Santa hiring polices in the company manual? The foolish store manager. She should have been paying more attention.

Editor's note: Just where would blogging be today if all posts were as mind-numbingly banal as those of the race-deniers. We apologize to anyone on the downhill slope of the bell-curve for this exercise in tenditious silliness.